You Don't Have to Have Liars in Your Life

It may have been a little while but, what do you think of when you hear the phrase "Fyre Festival"? For most people, the picture above is what comes to mind...a liar. 

Fyre Festival was an event hosted in the Bahamas in 2017 that scammed thousands of millennials out of money with the promise of an Instagramable event they would never forget. This opened up the topic of lying on a grand scale. In your life, how do you respond when find yourself being lied to?


Trust is essential in every arena - from friendships, marriages, and business relationships to even your doctors, children's schoolteachers, etc. You can have a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to deceit.

Here are some ways to respond when you are dealing with deceit:

IDENTIFY

First, try and identify which category the liar may be fitting into. Are they lying out of fear or shame? Or are they selfishly manipulating and operating for their own personal gain?

CONFRONT

Ask them clearly and directly. This conversation is best had in person and in a neutral setting.

LISTEN

Are they taking ownership? Is there any remorse?

DRAW BOUNDARIES

Let them know that you will not tolerate lying in your relationship and that you need people in your life to be honest with you. Reinforce how important trust is at the foundation and tell them they will need to rebuild your trust over time with their actions and that "I'm sorry" isn't enough without follow through.

WATCH

Have they changed their ways? Are they re-building trust? If they are then you may be able to patch the relationship to continue to work together in the future. But, if they are not changing their ways it may be time to set a new boundary. If you aren't sure how to move forward and are looking to speak to a professional, my office is open for us to talk.

Feel free to reach out to me for an appointment. You can either email me at leemiller.therapist@gmail.com or call my office at (310) 614-0323.