It can be hard to say “no.”
Sometimes it may even feel harsh to say no. So often we cushion the backend with reasonings and excuses as a way to soften the blow or, even worse, we don’t even use the word “no” but instead we offer a counterfeit yes that we don’t really want to deliver on.
If you find yourself in a position where you aren’t comfortable saying how you really feel, here are some things you can consider to help get to the root of it. In therapy we don’t like to just look at the symptoms but we truly want to get to the base cause of something to better understand it, then ultimately, change it if that’s what you wish to do.
Here are 3 possible reasons why it can feel difficult to say “no”
These reasons are all very real and only scratch the surface at why it may be difficult for you to hold your own boundary. Should any of those resonate with you, let me encourage you to speak with a licensed therapist who can help you unpack your own behaviors and get to the root. You may be surprised, but after you do some deep work internally it may have a ripple effect outside of you for the better as well.
Sometimes it may even feel harsh to say no. So often we cushion the backend with reasonings and excuses as a way to soften the blow or, even worse, we don’t even use the word “no” but instead we offer a counterfeit yes that we don’t really want to deliver on.
If you find yourself in a position where you aren’t comfortable saying how you really feel, here are some things you can consider to help get to the root of it. In therapy we don’t like to just look at the symptoms but we truly want to get to the base cause of something to better understand it, then ultimately, change it if that’s what you wish to do.
Here are 3 possible reasons why it can feel difficult to say “no”
- FEAR OF DISAPPOINTMENT
You may worry about the impact that disappointment another will have on you should you not live up to their expectations of you. - SCARCITY MINDSET
There can be so many opportunities you could have a scarcity mindset that if you say “no” to this you may not get another chance later on. - LOSS OF CONNECTION
You may be punished for not doing what someone else has said you should be doing and ultimately lose the connection you have with that person.
These reasons are all very real and only scratch the surface at why it may be difficult for you to hold your own boundary. Should any of those resonate with you, let me encourage you to speak with a licensed therapist who can help you unpack your own behaviors and get to the root. You may be surprised, but after you do some deep work internally it may have a ripple effect outside of you for the better as well.
