As we talked about in our last article procrastination is a common human
behavior, born out of a primal need to avoid discomfort if at all possible. Our
brains are wired that way, yet our lives are structured so as to require prompt
action, speedy reaction and efficiency in everything to maximize creativity.
How do we align these two conflicting needs? The key is to find a way to
minimize the discomfort which open the pathway in your brain that allows
motivation and forces movement.
Short formula: Ask yourself the following sequential questions
1. Am I avoiding this
_____________ (fill in the blank of task, meeting, whatever) because I don’t
like that activity, have no interest in it?
Or
2. I don’t feel competent to do
the _____________.
Perfectionism is direct cause of
procrastination: “If I can’t do it perfectly, I would rather just avoid it
altogether."
If the answer is #1, then do the
following:
·
Break the _____________ down
into its smallest parts thinking carefully about what steps would need to be
taken to get it completed.
·
Set a time by which you will
complete each step.
·
Create and attach a personal reward
to be received by you at the completion of each step (can be very small things
depending on what you do that makes you feel good. Some examples are eat
something healthy, go for a walk, take a nap, call a friend or family member,
do something creative etc.)
If the answer is #2, then try these
steps:
·
Decide who is the best person /
resource that can help you understand and teach you the skills need to complete
your _____________. This could be a person or even another resources
like the library or Google.
·
Create a list of questions that you
need answers to.
·
Set up a day and time to contact or
access the resource
·
Create a personal reward once you
have the answers you needed
·
Allow yourself to trust that what
you have learned we will be enough. There is no such thing as perfect. We live
in an imperfect world and most of the time we had to find a way to be satisfied
with “good enough “
If you need more substantial
talking through the projects/meetings/tasks you are avoiding and think there
can be deeper fears underlying, I'm available to help you process. Feel
free to reach out to me for an appointment. You can either email me at
leemiller.therapist@gmail.com or call my office at (310) 614-0323.
