In our last post we talked about identifying limiting beliefs which means you are ready for the second step: once you know they are
there, how do you go about changing them?
Right off the bat you need to know it is
never too late to be aware and to change. In an interview with GQ last week Sir
Paul McCartney shares his own experience with re-training his viewpoint of his skills.
"McCartney mentions that when the Beatles first started out, John gave him
a guitar solo and he totally blew it, after which he decided he'd never play
lead again, and adds that he has only really started again in the past ten
years." One blown opportunity, most likely paired with a belief that he
wasn't good enough, put him on a 50+ year journey of abstaining from playing lead
guitar! But, he was able to change his mindset and you can too.
HOW TO CHANGE LIMITING BELIEFS:
Realize - You already have done the hardest
work which is identifying your beliefs.
Reverse - Disprove what you have believed all
these years. Ask yourself
"Why do I think I am not good enough?" and then give yourself 3 reasons why that is not true.
"Why do I think I am not good enough?" and then give yourself 3 reasons why that is not true.
Replace - Simply being aware isn't enough. If
someone tells you not to think of purple monkeys, what are you suddenly
thinking of? Purple monkeys. So, if your thought is "I'm not good
enough" instead of trying to white-knuckle it and not think that thought
instead replace it with something along the lines of "I am good enough, I
am worthy just as I am."
Repeat - Say your new mantra over and over again. It
may feel uncomfortable at first, but soon it will sink in and you start to
really believe what you are telling yourself.
Of course, that is a diluted way to work on
changing your limiting beliefs. If you want to talk more or need help
excavating your thoughts feel free to reach out to me for an appointment. You
can either email me at leemiller.therapist@gmail.com or
call my office at (310) 614-0323.
